my Dad makes dad jokes but because hes a physics teacher theyre not common dad jokes
"hey dad, whats up?"
"Up is a directional vector with no force"
“A story has no beginning or end: arbitrarily one chooses that moment of experience from which to look back or from which to look ahead.”
__Graham Greene, The End of the Affair
IM SO FUCKING PUMPED FOR CHRISTMAS I EAT CHRISTMAS LIGHTS AS MY CEREAL I USE EGGNOG AS MY CONTAct LENS SOLUTION IM GROWING A BEARD
THIS IS WHAT I LIKE TO SEE
when the pizza guy came over today i was like “have a good day” and he said “dont tell me what to do” and i just stood there staring at him and then he’s like “lol i got that from drake and josh”